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[…]

I’m a native of Kashan.
Painting is my craft:
Now and then I build a cage with paint, sell it to you
So that with the song of poppies that is imprisoned in it
The heart of your loneliness may cheer up.
What a dream, what a dream…I know
My canvas is lifeless.
I know well, my painted fish tank contains no fishes.

[…]

let us curse not the Moonlight if we have fever
(Sometimes I have seen in fever, the moon descends,
and hands reach the ceiling of heaven.
I have noticed, the goldfinch sings better.
Sometimes a wound that I have had under my feet
have taught me the ups and downs of the ground.
Sometimes in my sickbed the size of a flower has multiplied,
and increased it has, the diameter of an orange, the radius of a lantern.)

And let us not fear death
(Death is not the end of the pigeon.
Death is not a cricket’s inversion.
Death flows in the soul of acacias.
Death has a seat in the pleasant climate of thinking.
Death in the spirit of the village’s night speaks of morning.
Death with a bunch of grapes comes into the mouth.
Death sings in the red larynx of the throat.
Death is responsible for the beauty of a butterfly’s wings.
Death sometimes picks basil.
Death sometimes drinks vodka.
Sometimes it is in the shade watching us.
and we all know
The lungs of pleasure, are full of the oxygen of death.)

[…]

from The Footsteps of Water, by Sohrab Sepehri

Arvo, my only daughter, flew the nest yesterday. It was an honour to be part of her life, to restore her health and her energy.

She is now living with a family in southern Scotland with a garden that backs onto a forest, three other cats, two dogs and a boy who looked about ten or eleven. Apparently she’s already made good friends with one of the other cats - Razor, and I am eagerly awaiting further updates. I am so pleased to have found her this family, of the hundred or so responses I had! This is exactly what I was hoping to find for her.

So long little one, my baby I wish you happiness, mice and good health.

Quite the belle of the ball now.
Still smells of varnish. delicious.

Quite the belle of the ball now.

Still smells of varnish. delicious.

All God does is watch us and kill us when we get boring. We must never, ever be boring

Chuck Palahniuk - Invisible Monsters

I never actually finished Invisible Monsters. I was in NYC age 17ish, had just finished Choke and it had all gotten to be a bit too much. 

Cathy Cunningham: hands closeup, progress. 
Slow progress.
Looks like i’m trying to do a Cezanne, but it’s just lassitude. things are broadly in the right place and the tone is almost right. 
getting there, frustrating, but it will take shape.
Will leave it until I come back in the Easter. I am fed up with hauling 30 canvases up and down the east coast of britain, only for them to sit around my room staring at me with such persecuting looks in their eyes as Cathy Cunningham has. People often comment on how kindly she looks. At first glance. But look again. It is not so simple. and it ought not be simple.  

Cathy Cunningham: hands closeup, progress. 

Slow progress.

Looks like i’m trying to do a Cezanne, but it’s just lassitude. things are broadly in the right place and the tone is almost right. 

getting there, frustrating, but it will take shape.

Will leave it until I come back in the Easter. I am fed up with hauling 30 canvases up and down the east coast of britain, only for them to sit around my room staring at me with such persecuting looks in their eyes as Cathy Cunningham has. People often comment on how kindly she looks. At first glance. But look again. It is not so simple. and it ought not be simple.  

Aphex Twin - Heliospan

will always be my fave aphex. sounds like quantum physics. Sounds like something we don’t understand

It was then that I had the bright idea of drinking myself to death. [ __ ] I’ve had enough of these streets that sweat a cold, yellow slime, of hostile people, of crying myself to sleep every night I’ve had enough of thinking, enough of remembering. Now whiskey, rum, gin, sherry, vermouth, wine and the bottles labelled |dum vivimus, vivimus…|.
Drink, drink, drink.
As soon as I sober up I start again.

Jean Rhys - Good Morning, Midnight.

This is the best book I have read in a long time. Sophia Jansen is a brilliant protagonist. 

Brought Rhys’s biog from Hatchards on the way home from the RA - ‘The Blue Hour’. will read it on the train tomorrow. It was raining and I had no money left to top up my oyster card so I though fuck it, and took a detour through Bloomsbury, checking out the blue plaques and I went past the 2 houses I lived in when I was little - on Gower street and Southampton Row. Went past Birkbeck, which was the start of my real education. 

cold rain, warm nostalgia! 

James Blake - Retrograde.

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm mmmm

my other acquisition!
This one is cuuurious because the canvas is stamped on the back ‘Percy Young: Slade School of Art’. SO it must be between 1881-1930 (http://www.npg.org.uk/research/programmes/directory-of-suppliers/y.php)… looks its age too. It is unsigned, and the guy selling it suggesting it might be a millais, but I don’t think so, Millais was good with design and he was good- excellent, but not (in technique) this good. this is masterful. I think this might have been another slade student. millais… never painted like this. 
does look a bit like john ruskin in the couple of years before his death
The fact that it is unsigned just makes it more interesting,and I remember when I refused to sign my paintings because I thought it was vulgar. and then I became a student, and learned the value of money. Signature or no signature, it’s the best painting in my collection.
I am going to get this one restored… when I get some money. Pawn more handbags :/ in fact, if it is signed it might be under hte layers of tobacco - and general - grime
It is fantastic. I have nothing more to say. I am not worthy.  

my other acquisition!

This one is cuuurious because the canvas is stamped on the back ‘Percy Young: Slade School of Art’. SO it must be between 1881-1930 (http://www.npg.org.uk/research/programmes/directory-of-suppliers/y.php)… looks its age too. It is unsigned, and the guy selling it suggesting it might be a millais, but I don’t think so, Millais was good with design and he was good- excellent, but not (in technique) this good. this is masterful. I think this might have been another slade student. millais… never painted like this. 

does look a bit like john ruskin in the couple of years before his death

The fact that it is unsigned just makes it more interesting,and I remember when I refused to sign my paintings because I thought it was vulgar. and then I became a student, and learned the value of money. Signature or no signature, it’s the best painting in my collection.

I am going to get this one restored… when I get some money. Pawn more handbags :/ in fact, if it is signed it might be under hte layers of tobacco - and general - grime

It is fantastic. I have nothing more to say. I am not worthy.  

I just brought this painting by andre lhote. I like this guy. 
Apparently he was a great teacher. I was looking at some of the photos of him in his studio surrounded by students, and he was working on this kinda shitty board. it’s clearly been nailed to something because it has holes all around it. shame. 
People are a bit snobby about lhote, I suppose having one foot in cubism and one in fauvism at the time was like having two religions but I like his attitude and there is a sinuousness in all his work that I appreciate, even if he didnt have matisses sense of colour or picasso’s humour.
When I’m rich I’ll get it restored. Maybe even sell it, although there are big problems with authenticating Lhote’s work. I don’t like much cubism, but i like this one^
It was only £50, not bad. Don’t think anyone else knows who Lhote is. If it weren’t for reading Lempicka’s biog I wouldn’t either.
oh well, so much the better for me. 

I just brought this painting by andre lhote. I like this guy. 

Apparently he was a great teacher. I was looking at some of the photos of him in his studio surrounded by students, and he was working on this kinda shitty board. it’s clearly been nailed to something because it has holes all around it. shame. 

People are a bit snobby about lhote, I suppose having one foot in cubism and one in fauvism at the time was like having two religions but I like his attitude and there is a sinuousness in all his work that I appreciate, even if he didnt have matisses sense of colour or picasso’s humour.

When I’m rich I’ll get it restored. Maybe even sell it, although there are big problems with authenticating Lhote’s work. I don’t like much cubism, but i like this one^

It was only £50, not bad. Don’t think anyone else knows who Lhote is. If it weren’t for reading Lempicka’s biog I wouldn’t either.

oh well, so much the better for me. 

think the hands / arms are coming along. 
although now I have made bk/g richer the face looks washed out. I don’t know. 
very pleased with the thumbnail and the watch
this photo aint good
went to manet exhibit today and read an essay on Hals influence on Manet and how it helped him to develop his signature summary brushstrokes. 
problem is that whilst that technique is lively it just doesnt work for an older person. some texture aside from just PAINT is necessary. I am getting there. havent worked on this one in months, but that manet gave me a fresh impetus. 
going to look a bit more at velasquez. he’s the man. 

think the hands / arms are coming along. 

although now I have made bk/g richer the face looks washed out. I don’t know. 

very pleased with the thumbnail and the watch

this photo aint good

went to manet exhibit today and read an essay on Hals influence on Manet and how it helped him to develop his signature summary brushstrokes. 

problem is that whilst that technique is lively it just doesnt work for an older person. some texture aside from just PAINT is necessary. I am getting there. havent worked on this one in months, but that manet gave me a fresh impetus. 

going to look a bit more at velasquez. he’s the man. 

paintpotface asked: Hello. This is totally random i know but my mother used to babysit your dad :) Ann Taylor. (then Russel) Cathy gave me a link to your website. Your work is very good indeed. Take Care

Sorry for the delay, your message just slipped through the net… but that’s so strange! I shall pass it on to him tomorrow, i’m sure he will remember.

Thanks very much, it’s good to hear positive feedback. Painting is bloody hard!

Your own work is great, I like your style very much and i’m about to go back and take a better look at your tumblr, which you are clearly much better at updating than I am!  

^ Now this is how one ought to paint a duchess!
Portrait of the Duchess de la Salle, 1925, Tamara de Lempicka
de Lempicka… Another controversial but (often) brilliant ‘society’ painter.

^ Now this is how one ought to paint a duchess!

Portrait of the Duchess de la Salle, 1925, Tamara de Lempicka

de Lempicka… Another controversial but (often) brilliant ‘society’ painter.